I’ll Be Around…just saying

Posted on September 23, 2010

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Okay, I hate coming to a fork in the road.  It appears I’ve reached the fork.  And geez, I’ll be honest, thought it would be easier.  Thought I would always know what to do, know what to say, but I must say, no clue.  Do you ever reach that moment in life when you are suddenly completely clueless?  When you simply scratch your head and say….well, you can imagine a few of the words.  Ugh, yep at that stage. Would love to have a screenplay to follow.  Would love to have a director to say yep, okay that is what you should do next, or to say, oh god no, don’t do that.  Unfortunately we don’t get that in life.  Instead we get the family and friend opinions which at times are helpful, and well, sometimes not so helpful.

I’m pretty sure that all of us reach that stage in our lives at some point.  Am also pretty sure we simply don’t share the fact that we are utterly clueless at that moment of time that we are simply clueless.  And perhaps, that is a good thing.  I’m not sure it is entirely helpful to know that others are at the moment of clueless…fork in the road, and no idea where to go next.  Not entirely inspiring.  I’m thinking many of us truly don’t want to admit the utter helpless feeling you might be at a certain point of your life.  Am thinking it is far more helpful to know that others know exactly what to do when things are good or when things are bad.  But, that’s not really always the way life works.

We tend to want to look like we are in complete control I’m thinking….or at least that we are in control in those moments when we are completely not in control.  And geez, relationships seem to be one of those moments in time when we want to have some control.  Yep, this post is about relationships.  I know I’ve been off the grid for a while.  Been dealing with some stuff, and they have all involved a very ill friend, a death and a long term relationship.  It appears the long term relationship has changed.  Yep, the fork in the road.  And I’m at the point of not sure what to do next.  Wishing I had a script or at the least a director to point me in the right direction.  It might come as a surprise for me to admit that I’m a private person and don’t like to share real personal stuff, but felt like it might be helpful to another who might be going through a change in their lives.  What I do know is change is simply a part of life.  It just sucks when it happens to be you.  To be honest, it is so easy to say that when the change is happening to someone else.  I know.  I’ve given that advice that change is part of life.  Amazing how different it feels when it is your life.

So, for all of those who are dealing with change…well, your friends will be around…and you, will be around for those friends who are going through change.  The beauty of life and friendship…well, we all are around.  And, that is a gift in itself.

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Posted in: Friendship, Life